Chapter 30

“I wasn’t dreaming about this,” Myriam muttered as she looked around. She was standing in an empty Mystic Falls square. The tent was there, the Grill, everything like she remembered it to be. But it wasn’t her dream. Her dream had been filled with cabbage fields but the cabbages were baby heads, and it was creepy as they were crying their literal heads off.

It was then she noticed Damon sitting on one of the benches and waving her over. “Hello, gorgeous!”

She sighed as she sat down next to him. “What the hell are you doing?”

“I’m doing this with everyone’s permission,” Damon assured her as he gently tapped her on her leg. “I figured we needed to have a chat and this was the only way that I could assure my safety.”

Myriam looked at him, confused for a moment. “You’re leaving me too?”

“What!” Damon huffed as he put an arm around her. “No! But you’re making it kinda hard for me to be your friend still, you know, because of you choose who you’re hanging out with.”

“Still that, huh?” she got up from the bench. “Yeah, you know what? I understand you don’t like my husband, but to think that I’m anything like him and that I’ve changed overnight after he came to town still hurts, Damon. But in your mind, I’m associated with Klaus, and that makes me the bad guy too. And I’m not going to fight you on that again. But I’m also not going to talk to you. So, let me go.”

“Nah,” Damon didn’t move from his seat. “I brought you in here because this is where we had some of our best talks, even before Klaus made his presence known. You know, when you were Myriam Hawthorne? You warned me about people and disapproved of Katherine because you knew her.”

“It wasn’t as if you listened,” she sulked as she kicked against a rock.

“I liked that Myriam very much.”

“That Myriam is dead. I have a big scarlet red headstone to prove it.”

“Is she, though? Because when we met again, you were doing the same thing. You protected me and in a way, Stefan. You cared. It wasn’t until Klaus came to town that you decided to stop controlling yourself and it lead us to fear you even more than we needed to fear Klaus,” Damon said kindly. “And Kol said the same, you know. You’re the only one who fought for him, while he was dead and after he came back.”

“But let me guess, it’s the in-between bits that you hate.”

He shrugged. “We all have our moments. I’m not here to judge you on your body count, because I want to bet mine is still higher. But you killed Caroline and mutilated Stefan.”

“Eye for an eye.”

“I happened to care about both.”

“Tough. You’re a vampire, get over it.”

“And you are a supernatural mystery,” Damon finally got to his feet and looped his arm through hers as he started to walk around the square with her. “The witch turned vampire turned Original Vampire turned Vampire ripper and back to your Original self. Not to mention everything you’ve seen and experienced over the years… I don’t want to be you.”

“Gee, thanks.”

“So I understand that you’re scared about your current status,” Damon replied with a sigh. “And it’s a tough cookie to swallow because I know that you were alright with not having children. You accepted the fact that you were barren – I didn’t know back then that you were a vampire, but still.”

“I’m not having this baby, Damon.”

“I’m not saying you should, it’s your decision, but you do have to realise that the Mikaelsons want this baby. It’s their blood. So either way, you’ll have to deal with it anyway. And you could run, but you love Klaus so much that you’d return eventually,” he said with a shrug. “And to be honest, I think you’d be a great mother.”

“What!”

“No, seriously,” he laughed. “It’s why I suggested you allowed my uncle Zak to take care of you. Not because you were older and because I took pity on you, but because you’d make a great mother. Because you are capable of kindness. You take so much care of your life, the people around you. You’re fair, and you’re always willing to help someone out.”

“And look where that got me.”

“Yeah well… between all the good bits you do stuff we don’t agree on so…” Damon shrugged. “But Myriam, you don’t have to be so vicious anymore. You’re reunited with your family. Kol is back in the land of the living, and you have so many people who are more than willing to do the dirty work for you. And you have your club back! This place is amazing, Myriam! I’m so proud of you for carving out your own little patch of normal in this crazy world.”

“I set that business up 300 years ago, Damon. It’s always been mine even when I was off doing things for Klaus or fleeing from Mikael.”

“And I know you take great pride in it.”

“And you’re going to tell me that I’m going to be a proud mother? That’s just ridiculous. Vampires shouldn’t have children!”

“But you were human once. What were your thoughts then?”

“That was a different life. I was poor, homeless and I was constantly raped. It’s a damn near miracle that I never got pregnant then,” she spat as they continued to circle the square.

“Surely you dreamt about it?”

“Dreams are just that. It wasn’t in the cards for me. Nobody wanted me for a wife. The colour of my skin would have made me a servant or a companion like my mother and I would have ended up just like her.”

“But what if?”

Myriam sighed, knowing that Damon wouldn’t give up. “It’s not something I wish to discuss.”

“Well, I do.”

She was quiet for a moment as she thought of what she felt back then when she was still human. “I was so in love with Klaus back then, and sure, I even imagined what it’d be like if I’d have his children, but he was a vampire and couldn’t conceive. I never even brought it up in conversations because Rebekah kept talking about wanting to be human, like me, and start a family. When I came to the New World on my own, as a married woman, I saw all those women with their husbands and children, and I knew that that would never be a possibility for me. Klaus would never allow someone else than him to bed me and even Klaus bedding me took nearly 30 years. So again, I gave up, and when I turned, that dream was forever gone. As the years progressed, I learned to accept it. Even if I had been a human still, the constant threat of Klaus’ enemies and his father haunted me. Our child would never have a safe haven. A safe place,” she rubbed her eyes with her free hand to crush the tears that were coming out of them. “Instead, I cared for my demons as if they were my children. By treating them well, they served me well.”

“And then Esther turned you into a different kind of vampire, and you lost them as well.”

“Yeah… now I don’t have anything but the club.”

“Klaus told me about his mother’s spell. You would have reverted back to being a human after you’d completed the task she sent out for you.”

“Yeah, well, her spell was meant to do more things, and my demons thankfully stopped all that, I just wished they would have interfered with turning me part human again, too.”

Damon nodded as he led her to the coffee place and got them something to drink. “Dr Wes Maxfield and the Augustines knew about your condition.”

She blinked at him then. “What?”

He let out a breath. “After Elena and I were cured, I went back there to see if we could find a cure for you. I found a list of everyone associated with the Augustines and killed them all. Raided their homes for their files. I found my own file. Enzo’s. Elena’s. Back in the day, they liked to open us up and remove vital organs, studying the healing qualities of a vampire in a hope to cure illnesses or grow new limbs. Hurt like a bitch, especially when your eye would be scooped out on a daily basis. Or your pancreas cut out of you… Enzo and I were the ones providing them with all the scientific data they needed and desired.”

“I wanted to go back and kill them,” Myriam muttered.

“Elena’s file was pretty straightforward, but yours? Not so much. You kept passing out and coming to and administered the compound several times, but it wouldn’t stick. So, instead, they cut you open and found a fully functional womb with a fetus in it.”

“What?”

“And they cut it out. The fetus died, but they put it in one of those jars with fluid in them and stuff. After that, they could do whatever they wanted with you. That fetus protected you from the ripper compound.”

“I was pregnant before?”

Damon nodded slowly. “They wanted to keep you around because you were the vampire who could get pregnant but Wes wanted to test the compound instead and alienated most of the board of trustees.”

“I was pregnant before, and they killed it?!” she slammed her hand on the table. “What the actual fuck!”

“I found the jar and took it to your headstone in Mystic Falls. Dug a hole and gave it a proper burial for you. I… I didn’t say anything because you were so out of it and I didn’t trust Klaus with this information.”

“Did Alaric know?”

“No. I didn’t tell anyone. Not even Stefan or Elena. But I did compel Alaric to forget that I drained him of his blood to get the vervain out and that he needed to go to New Orleans to keep an eye on you,” Damon admitted, a playful smile on his face. “I must admit, he was home faster than I ever expected, whatever you did, he surely mustn’t have liked that.”

“Killed his witchy friend who wanted to syphon the compound out of me but she’d take my extra strength and durability along with it,” she muttered. “See? I only kill someone when they deserved it. Stefan is still alive because even though he deserves death, I thought it’d be funny if he didn’t have a leg.”

“He has grown a new leg.”

“Fucker. I’ll have to come back then.”

“No,” Damon shook his head laughing. “You’re going to leave Stefan alone, and you’re going to enjoy being pregnant with an impossible and magical baby that’s yours and your husband’s. You finally got what you wanted all these years ago, and you should embrace this with open arms. After all the crap you’ve endured, you finally have something positive in your life.”

“But I’ll be a horrible parent! And what about our enemies? There’s literally an immortal aunt on the loose who had made a deal with their mother that every firstborn Mikaelson will be taken away by her! I can’t keep a child safe!”

“You’ll be a great mother, Myriam,” Damon took her hand and squeezed it. “All you need to do is to be more in touch with your emotions because I have the feeling that you have stopped allowing yourself to feel much than just the surface of things.”

“If I don’t keep a lid on my feelings then I’d be an emotional wreck. We don’t want to go there, Damon,” she warned him. “There’s not knowing what I’d do if I felt as deeply as I felt as a human. Likely kill more. Paint New Orleans red. Literally,” Myriam rubbed her eyes again as the tears kept falling. “Because I fucking lost a child that I didn’t know I was pregnant within the first place and if I allow myself to feel that deeply, I just want to raise the entire Whitmore campus and school to the ground. Set it all on fire, kill everyone.”

“And I did that for you. All the medical information about all the subjects and shit is gone. The fire was amazing. You need to allow yourself to be taken care of, Myriam. That’s why you have a family. A husband. A great best friend. You no longer have to protect them or yourself. Allow them to take care of you so you can be your best self and take care of that miracle baby of yours.”

“But-”

“You deserve it. You’re a Queen, Myriam. Klaus literally worships the ground you walk on even though he has a shitty way of showing it. He may not win the award for husband of the year, but he did tell Kol to come and get me so we could have a talk about what’s going on. Because you know I’m right.”

“But I’m afraid, Damon.”

“And you should!” Damon laughed. “That’s the joy of being a parent, live in fear all the damn time because your child could stub their toe or cut themselves open! And when they’re a teenager, who knows what they’ll bring home? Every new mom is afraid, and you can’t ever be ready to become a mother, but you adjust and adapt. Your child will be safe. In fact, I bet it’ll be safer in your family than a normal child is with human parents.”

“But-”

“I tell you what,” Damon smiled at her. “I’m currently sharing your bed with you. Good thing you told your security guys that no Mikaelson was allowed to enter the building because your husband doesn’t like me much, but… I want to take you somewhere after you wake up and continue this conversation, what do you think? Think you can do that without ripping my heart out?”

Myriam let out a chuckle. “Sure.”

“Good, now wake up.”

~o.O.o~

Damon told her to take a shower and freshen herself up and feed appropriately before they headed out. Myriam was feeling lighter for some reason and thanked Damon for that. “Don’t thank me yet,” he had said as they went to the first hospital they could find and headed straight to the maternity ward where, as it happened, a bunch of mothers were walking around with their big bellies.

“Excuse me,” Damon asked one of them. “Hi,” he smiled. “My name is Damon, and this is my girlfriend Hope, and I was wondering if you could tell her how you were feeling.”

“Excuse me?”

“Hope’s pregnant and scared shitless.”

The woman barked out a laugh. “Oh! Who here isn’t? Is it your first, sweetheart?” the woman said as she took her hand and led her to sit down somewhere. “Everyone’s afraid with their first. Or their second. Or third… because we as mothers don’t know if we can handle it. Or we think the world is a scary place. Or we have money woes. When I had my first, I freaked out. My husband couldn’t calm me down, and I was paranoid about just about everything. The baby had to get everything new, cleaned. Everything was, and when people wanted to touch my baby I had them clean their hands with antibacterial soap first!”

“That’s a bit overboard…” Myriam muttered.

“It is,” the woman nodded. “My best friend was pregnant around the same time as I was, the wife of a cop. She begged her husband to stay home all the time because she didn’t want to risk raising the baby by herself.”

“I can imagine…”

“But it gets better. Once you have your bundle of joy in your arms, you feel as if you can take on the world! You’ll realize that sanitizing everything for your child does more harm than good or that your husband needs his job so he can keep a roof over your head. The fear never goes away, but if you surround yourself with the right people, it’ll be just fine. I promise,” she squeezed Myriam’s hand. “This is my fourth child, and it might be my last, but who knows? Children are such a blessing and so worth the fear and anxiety. Just roll with it.”

“That’s easier said than done…”

The woman shrugged then. “That’s the best way, really. Women have been giving birth for millennia, and every single one at some point has been scared out of her wits. But everything will be fine. I promise.”

“Thank you,” Myriam smiled at her. “I feel a lot better.”

“Good, because a stressed out mom is bad for the baby,” the woman smiled. “Now, if you’d excuse me, I have to go back to the ward, I think that baby number four is about to be born.”

“Good luck,” Myriam watched as the woman waddled away from them before pointing at her. “Why don’t I look like that?”

“You’re a vampire. Of course, you’re not showing,” Damon huffed. “Or it could be your baby’s magic. Klaus said that his sister said it was hiding?”

“Yeah, okay, makes sense,” Myriam sighed as she got to her feet. “Alright, let’s go and meet with my husband… after I make a short stop at a pharmacy to get him something.”

~o.O.o~

She had taken Damon’s hand as she walked into the courtyard where the entire family was sitting as she had requested, enjoying a drink. “Thank you,” Myriam said as she came to a halt before them. “For… bringing Damon to me. He was a big help.”

“You look a lot better, love,” Klaus smiled at her as he got to his feet to greet her properly. “Are you feeling better?”

“I still feel that this whole thing is being forced upon me but yeah, sure, let’s roll with it,” she shrugged before handing Klaus a gift bag. “That’s for our future adventures together. Should we be able to get another, at least I want to have some say in it.”

Klaus looked in the gift bag and then looked at her, shocked. “What!”

“Hey, I’m a vampire, modern medicine doesn’t work on me. You’re so going to suit up after this kid is born!” Myriam smiled at him before sitting down next to Kol and grabbed his glass of alcohol.

“No, no, darling,” he said as he took it from her hands. “No more alcohol for you. If it’s true what Damon says about you, your insides work differently than ours.”

“The technical term they used for Myriam was hybrid,” Damon said, not daring to move an inch in an area filled with Original vampires, even though he was confident he was going to be left alone. “A human with regenerative abilities. Something between a human and a vampire. It’s likely you won’t even need blood anymore.”

“But you told me that-” She could feel the anger rise inside of her but tried to keep her cool. She’d promised Damon.

“I didn’t want to upset you, I know how much you like to be an Original vampire, indestructible. You still are, just… more human. With fangs and impenetrable skin.”

“So my insides are human, but the rest of me is supernatural,” she quipped as she got to her feet. “Great! Now if you’d excuse me, I have a former witch to kill!”

Kol stopped her with a smirk on his face.

“What?”

“It’s not Mother’s fault. Her spell would have worked perfectly if your pesky pets hadn’t interfered.”

“My pets saved me from killing you! If your mother hadn’t taken me for some sense of irony, then I would still have been a fucking vampire. Fragile, sure, but just imagine, it’s so easy to incapacitate me now! Just slip me some poison, and I’d be down until my body would heal itself! I only had to worry about vervain and wolf bites before!”

“I’m all for killing Mother,” Freya nodded. “Because of her, I grew up with Dahlia, who, by the way, is still coming.” Freya took Myriam’s hand and took her down to the dungeons with her. “Let’s do some bonding, shall we?”

“Nice and slow?” Myriam smiled widely. “I did that with another vampire, I sent her parts as a present to Damon and Stefan. Even Klaus, because he had shown an interest in her.”

“Oh, hell yes.”

“I think not,” Klaus was unamused. “I find her rotting away a much better option,” he took the hands of his sister and his wife and took them back upstairs. “If you truly want to do something, I suggest you go back to Débauche and get your belongings. You’re coming home, Myriam.”

“The hell I am,” she stood next to Damon who hadn’t moved at all, which was so unlike him. “They won’t kill you, you know,” Myriam playfully elbowed him.

“I just want to get out of here, unless you need me?”

“I’d like it if you’d stick around but I understand that you don’t want to.”

“Nah, we’re dealing with some idiot right now in Mystic Falls, and Stefan and Elena will likely fuck shit up, so I’d better go,” he placed a kiss on her cheek. “Call me when you want a talk or to vent, okay?”

“I’ll try.”

Damon smiled then and left immediately. It was then when Rebekah almost jumped up and hugged Myriam tightly. “I’m going to be an aunt! Myriam, you have to move back in here so we can protect you and the baby.”

“I don’t have to do anything,” Myriam said as she gently pushed Rebekah away from her and sat down in Klaus’ lap. “Débauche is safer than the compound.”

“Nonsense!” Rebekah huffed.

“Do I need to remind you that your mother snuck in and gave us breakfast? That won’t happen in Débauche,” she then looked at Klaus and smiled. “Unless you can close all exits and allow me to turn this place into a fortress as well?”

He gently took her hand and kissed it. “Love, you are safe here, even without your reinforcements. Rebekah is right, you should move back in and if you feel safer by having our rooms protected by the same magic you have over at your club, then so be it. But not the entire building.”

“You’re really willing to do that for me?”

“All you need to do is ask, love. It’s all you’ve ever needed to do, but you never do.”

“Because I don’t want to be a bother.”

“You’re my wife, you’re never a bother unless you run away and hide. Because you’re making me feel worried when I’m not near you.”

Myriam sighed as she put her head on Klaus’ shoulders and noticed that everyone had given them some privacy. “I’m sorry I reacted the way that I did.”

“That’s alright, love, I’m afraid as well.”

Myriam bit her lip as she looked up at him as she remembered her conversation with Damon. “I need to tell you something… well… a lot. But I don’t want anyone to overhear us, because it needs to be between you and me. Can we go to Débauche for the night?”

“Of course,” he softly kissed her. “But tomorrow we’re going to make our rooms to your liking because I do wish for you to move back in with us.”

“That’s fine.”

“Really?”

Myriam nodded. “Yes. It’s time that we find a middle ground, you and I, and I’m willing to give up my residence in Débauche for that. But I won’t stop running it.”

“I’m not asking you to,” he smiled at her and helped her to her feet. “Very well, let’s have a quiet evening without eavesdroppers.”

They picked up some food along the way, and Myriam lifted the Mikaelson ban with her security before taking Klaus upstairs with her. Spreading their food – which was some Chinese and local cuisine – on the table, she sighed. “What did Damon tell you exactly?”

“Merely about his experiences with the Augustines himself and how they knew that you were a special kind of vampire. One that they preferred to keep due to your insides,” he replied as he took a bite off his food. “He kept it a secret from everyone including us to keep you safe.”

Myriam nodded as she toyed with her food, suddenly not that hungry anymore. “I want to tell you a few things, and I want you to promise to let me finish before saying anything.”

“You can tell me anything, Myriam, you know this.”

“I know, but some things were better kept a secret because whatever you’d try, it wouldn’t be able to happen, frivolous things that don’t really matter,” she got up and sat down in his lap. Her chairs at the table were comfortable, and she had chosen them for this reason specifically so she could just be lazy and feel like a cat. “You know how little girls usually dream of having children, right? Become a mother?”

“Of course. Rebekah drove us mad by wanting to play her version of house when we were growing up. She’s always wanted to be a mother, and I’m sure she’ll be a great aunt to our child.”

“For a while, I had those dreams too. I played house with my friends. I wanted to be just like my mother until I found out what she’d really been prior to falling pregnant with me and then I knew that her fate was going to be mine. We were too poor to go up in life. The colour of our skin, while accepted, still worked against us. I was resigned to be a servant or become like my mother, and that was going to be the only way I was ever going to get children of my own. And that sucked. My mother struggled raising me on her own. So I pushed that thought aside. When she died, and I went to look for better opportunities, I was at risk of falling pregnant all the time, I’m surprised that didn’t happen then.”

Klaus nuzzled her ear. “I’m sure you would have found a lovely gentleman eventually, Myriam.”

She barked out a laugh then. “In that time? No. And then I kidnapped Kol, and he kidnapped me right back. I didn’t have to worry with him because with him being a vampire, it meant that he couldn’t get me pregnant. And then with you… I never felt the things for Kol as I feel for you, Klaus. He’ll always be my best friend, I never saw him as anything else but you… even now you only have to look at me, and I melt into a puddle of drool. I feel you in every fibre of my being. You’re a part of me.”

“I feel the same, love,” he whispered as he continued to nuzzle her earlobe.

“But especially then, you were not open to any romantic feelings, and that was alright, I’m a patient woman, and I waited for you,” she smiled as she leaned into him to stop him from doing what he was doing. “I always believed you’d be a great father and it was a shame that you were a vampire. I even had my demons look for ways to make you fertile again or even if there was anything magical I could do but we came up empty. So I forgot about having children, again. Resigned to the fact that I wanted to spend my life with you and that meant without any offspring.”

“My apologies love, I wasn’t aware that-”

“It’s alright,” she smiled at him. “It’s something a woman tends to keep to herself. Usually, the thought of having children would scare men away. When we married, and you sent me off to the New World, it wasn’t easy. All these women with their husbands, falling pregnant, having babies, doing their duty for the colony and there I was. Alone. For a long while, I wished I’d be raped and be pregnant so that we could have a child of our own. Because I knew that while the child wouldn’t be yours, you were going to love it nonetheless.”

She let out a long sigh and shook her head. “And then I died. Turned. And I had to give up on the idea completely, and I was fine with it. I got what I wanted; I could spend my days with you for eternity, and that’s what I liked above everything else. When you brought Marcel into the mix, I hadn’t thought about becoming a mother for so long and couldn’t even remember what my own mother was like so I left you for you to take care of him on your own. You didn’t give me a choice at that point.”

“Why didn’t you say anything about this before?”

“Because it wasn’t important, and later, impossible.”

“But Rebekah talks about it all the time.”

“She’s still a teenager at heart, Klaus. She may be over a thousand years old, but emotionally she’s not older than maybe 20. It’s the age where you still want things, no matter how impossible. I was realistic and kept my dreams to myself.”

“And yet, here we are,” he smiled as he placed his hand on her stomach. “You are carrying my child.”

“If it weren’t for your mother and my demons, this wouldn’t have been possible. And I was freaking out because this is impossible and I am impossible. I mean…” she let out a breath. “This is going to be hard to hear, and it made me so very angry, and it still does but… Damon told me what Dr Wes did to me and what the Augustines did to him in the past. Wes found out that I was a special kind of vampire because when he took me, he opened me up to see why the serum he developed wasn’t working. And found that I had a uterus and a fetus in it.”

“What! You were pregnant then?”

She looked at him with tears in her eyes. “He cut everything out of me and put it in a jar with preservation fluids and then the serum took. I was likely crazy with hormones still but…”

“I’m going to kill him!”

“Damon went back after he was cured,” she said as she put a hand on his mouth. “Found everyone involved with the society and killed them all. Took their research and burned it all. He found his file and Enzo’s, and mine. He read mine and burnt it. He took the jar with our baby in it and gave it a proper burial in the plot that I’d reserved for myself for the person who I was in 1864 in Mystic Falls.”

“Everything’s gone?”

Myriam nodded.

“Well, at least he’s not completely useless then…”

“And he kept my secret, even from me, to keep me safe. Because while you’re a vampire-werewolf hybrid, I’m a vampire, but on the inside, I’m still human. I don’t know how that works, exactly, but I’m a vampire that can get pregnant. Just imagine if the word got out…”

“Don’t worry, love,” he brushed her lips with hers. “Nobody outside our family will know about this, and you’re right in being worried about security at the compound. So our rooms, including the one we decide to become the nursery, will be secure to your standards.”

“I can bring in the people I used for Débauche?”

He nodded. “As long as the rooms will be accessible to our family.”

“Thank you,” she smiled at him.

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